Being Brave

Fear is a relative construct. What terrifies me might not even register with — or might even be enjoyable to — someone else, and vice-versa. And if bravery can be defined (albeit simplistically) as the facing of one’s fears, then by some transitive property, bravery is also inherently relative.

Viewed now in my rear-view mirror — my overcoming of my own fears, tiny, far in the background, and my kids’ experiences much closer — it is almost unbelievable to consider the sheer number of potential fears that a child needs to overcome to healthily transition between babyhood, childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. And with each comes an opportunity to show bravery. The watching of a movie that previously scared them. Walking to school alone the first time. Enduring a trip to the dentist to have a cavity filled (not to mention, the anticipation of such an event). Getting a bottle of cold water from the dark, labyrinthine basement. Think about death and the concept of non-existence. Petting a cat.

Surely, not even adults are without their own fears.

So write to your child about a time they were really — or even a little bit — brave, in facing up to one of these fears, and congratulate them on the courage they must have mustered, regardless of how small or trivial it might seem to you.